Sensory Help Now

Valentine's Day is approaching and many schools or colleges will have events to celebrate this. For many young people, this is a fun experience. However, for just as many, Valentine’s Day can cause them to be filled with stress, anxiety and fear. For many neurodivergent young people, Valentine’s Day can come with disruptive commotion, extra information to process, emotional signals and exchanges that they are unsure of and language that they might struggle to process.

Some children and young people can feel left out if they do not receive cards or gifts and may feel overwhelmed by disappointment come the end of Valentine’s Day. Many young people with sensory processing differences might feel self-conscious already and not receiving cards or gifts or being invited to a Valentine’s Day party or dance might add to their feelings of exclusion and low self-esteem.

In addition, some of the triggers related to Valentine’s Day that can be disruptive for neurodivergent young people and others with sensory processing differences can include a break from routine, unusual decorations and displays and group activities with unclear purposes.

So what can we do to make Valentine’s Day a special day for all? At home you can start with activities that help your neurodivergent child or teen feel safe and valued. A child or young person who feels safe and connected will be able to better process emotional disappointments in the outside world. You can also use this day as an opportunity to discuss and celebrate differences. Help your child or teen notice how they can have a lot in common with others and, at the same time, differ from others and how these variations of self are beautiful in their own right. Also use the day as an opportunity to teach children and young people to celebrate themselves and to remind them how their worth is not defined by opinions, gifts or invitations from others. Perhaps plan a favourite activity to celebrate your child.

Finally, check with your child’s school what Valentine’s Day activities they’re planning on doing and when. Make sure you get all the small details from the school so that your child or teen is prepared and knows what to expect. This includes things like the decorations they plan on putting up as well as any coloured or themed clothing that children are going to be encouraged to wear. 

Happy Valentine's Day!

Best wishes

Lelanie

PS You might also be interested in our free online course ‘Understanding Sensory Processing and Integration in Teenagers and Young Adults’. This course explores the different sensory integration difficulties people present with as a result of inadequate processing and integration of the senses and explains how these difficulties can impact a teen's or young adult’s day-to-day activities. The course also provides a toolkit of ideas to help you support your young person as well as strategies they can use to recognise and manage their own sensory needs with more independence. Watch it for free here.

Sensory Snapshot is a regular series by Advanced SI Practitioner and OT Lelanie Brewer. Lelanie gained her MSc in OT at Brunel University, London, and is pursuing a PhD with Newcastle University. Experienced in the NHS, charity and private sectors, as well as being a UK university senior lecturer, Lelanie is the Lead for Continuous Professional Development at Sensory Integration Education.